Monday, February 28, 2005

Sistani and Law

My fellow Iranian, Grand 'Ayatollah Seyyed 'Ali Sistani has blessed us with a very informative and illuminating website. The color scheme and overall structure of the sight are also very pleasing.

Some selections from the Question & Answer section:

Question: Is anal intercourse permissible.?

Answer:Permission is bound to wife’s agreement, but it is strongly

Question:Is one allowed to consume alcohol for medical purposes? Consume drugs for medical purposes?

Answer:It is permissible to benefit from just amount needed for treatment.

Question:While taking bath, it’s said that one should not keep head under shower for more than one minute, is it true?

Answer:It’s not in order.

Question:If my wife wants me to masturbate in front of her, is it then allowed?

Answer:You are not allowed to do it with hand, but your wife is.

Question:What is an orgy?

Answer:It's forbidden.

Question:I am really sorry that I have to ask this type of Question. But Since I grew up in a western country; I rally don't much about our religion. And I can't ask this Question to my parents due to subject matter. Brother my question is, can we have an oral sex before or after the sexual intercourse or can we have oral sex at all? Is it haram?

Answer:Oral sex act is permissible with the consent of both husband and wife provided that no liquid gets into the mouth.

Question:Is playing a chess allowed?

Answer:It is absolutely unlawful.

Blue and Black

People criticize the color combination of black and navy blue. I think that such judgments stem from profound cultural decay and indicate an underlying tendency to worship destruction.

Does anyone feel me? Even murderers cripwalk! I'm thug in any color.

In other news, Tony Kornheiser of ESPN's Pardon the Interruption is bald, at least an admirer of fascism and probably a Bush-Rove plant. He contends that Chris Rock "went over the line in criticizing the President by saying that there were bodies bleeding everywhere." Pardon the interruption, but who the fuck is Tony Kornheiser to try to blind us to the ever-sharpening glare of death? They're all drinking the same water now. Did anyone notice how dead the eyes were even in the throbbing glow of the Oscar regalia?

There you have it.

Libertarians are idiots.

I don't like to think of myself as someone who generalizes too much, but libertarians are all fucking retards.

To examine the roots of this readily apparent fact, we must first ask ourselves, what is libertarianism? It is not, as some would hold, a single phenomenon, and its possible meanings are rather divergent.

In its original usage, it referred to a political view roughly equivalent to what we popularly call anarchism, while the modern American usage refers to the school of thought related to the writings of this lady. The difference between these two possible meanings is unmistakeable; while the former, often called 'socialist libertarianism' or 'anarcho-syndicalism' opposes private property as a root of inequality and therefore a barrier to liberty, the latter, which some like to call 'anarcho-capitalism' holds that government offends most when it limits private property, which its adherents revere like a god.

How can these radically different ideologies get confused? My friend with the poofy hair says that it's because they're insane. I don't disagree. However, I think that it's a more complex situation; libertarianism is an ambiguous and relatively flat buzzword because libertarians are fucking stupid. Don't get me wrong, the left-libertarians that I desribed have wonderful writers among them, especially Pierre-Joseph Proudhon, who was French, but modern-day anarchists are generally disaffected children/isolated as children and they are, therefore, socially inept and marginalized. Also, they don't know what they're talking about. Read some Proudhon and you'll probably be better-educated about anarchism than any anarchist (except those that read Proudhon, but I bet you a burnin' flag that most don't). Indeed, it isn't so difficult to be an anarchist/libertarian (in the traditional or modern sense), just as it isn't difficult to like popcorn:

The ordinary man is an anarchist. He wants to do as he likes. He may want
his neighbor to be governed, but he himself doesn't want to be governed. He
is mortally afraid of government officials and policemen.

-George Bernard Shaw

Exactly. George Bernard Shaw is whack, but the point is that it doesn't take much fucking mental exertion to come up with the notion that power is inherently abusive. Where can you go with that, though? American libertarians are so stupid that they probably dribble food on their chins as they eat. All of them. Reactionary racist fucking bastards, and if I could sue them for just being who they are, I would. 'Government' is a euphemism for 'black people', which is what they really have a problem with. When I was 13, I thought to myself, 'yeah, no one should be able to tell me what to do, because I know what's best!' I have since come to the conclusion that I can't provide myself or my family with adequate healthcare, etc. alone. But I trust libertarians to find their own goddamn healthcare, and I suggest they get it from this guy.

February Sweeps

As the shortest month of the year comes to a close, so ends what I like to call 'February Sweeps', in which almost everyone I know started a blog. Yes, the joke is tired, but so is the blog format. That is how I choose to begin this endeavor. May we swallow evil whole.

I have Arabic in around 10 minutes, which means that I will be doing this in about an hour and fifteen minutes.

Alea iacta est.